3 mindsets that stunt women's growth- Internalizing the Revolution!

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   Yes, it is true that only 23% of Executive positions are held by Women around the world, and we often focus on enumerating the external factors for this disparity. Sometimes, only closed eyes can see clearly since the mind’s eyes then begin to focus better! It is more important to realize those internal factors, those invisible nets, that trap each of us.

I would like to discuss 3 of these often-overlooked reasons for this gender-based disparity in professional growth and possible ways to overcome the same.

1. Rewiring existing Internalizations:

The human race has been around for 2 million years, and its remarkably rapid growth has revolutionized the place we live in, the food we eat, the vehicles we ride, and the clothes we wear. But old habits don’t die easy! You see, men were initially involved in providing for the family, and were associated with strength, courage, and confidence, while women were responsible for nurturing and nourishment of their family- so, associated with love, care, and politeness.

As much as modernization is expanding, we still carry in us, the genes of our ancient ancestors from over 2 million years! Internalization of these ideas within the minds of both men and women dates not back to the 18-19 centuries, but to several hundred centuries. These are some deep-rooted internalized subconscious-level opinions and need re-writing since its antiquated, and no longer relevant.

Internalization is the integration of attitudes, values, standards, and opinions into one’s sense of self or identity.

Experiences lead to internalization; repetition leads to internalization, and this produces a superior quality understanding than intellectualized learning, as mentioned by Ray Dalio. So, it is to an extent, the process of taking ideas from the conscious mind to the subconscious level, which controls over 95% of our actions on a day-to-day basis.

So, to re-write, we must feed the corrections consciously, until it becomes sub-conscious.

This exercise can help most times: Question anything, especially when pertaining to an impulse thought or response linked to gender-based differentiation: is it a RULE or a B’RULE- Which is a BS rule, derived from a book by Vishen Lakhiani. Figure out your rules and discard what your rationale screams ‘Brule’ and apply that rationale into actions consciously, one action towards betterment, at a time.

2. Discarding the Victimhood:

Women often fall victim to someone’s action for no fault of theirs. However, there’s a fine line between Victimhood vs marginalized.

Are we blaming someone or something for our undesired situations? Do we assume or claim that we deserve sympathy? Screen for this Victimhood mentality in our thoughts and actions.

Sometimes, we tend to fall prey to this dangerous game of avoiding responsibility and criticism, receiving attention and compassion, and evading feelings of genuine anger.

Learned helplessness: Closely associated with this Victimhood mentality, is another culprit that stops women from realizing their fullest potential.

- Being subjected to difficult circumstances often leads to us believing that the situation is unchangeable and is beyond our control.

- So, we stop trying to overcome the obstacle, settling for lesser than what we could realize, and the vicious cycle of victimhood and learned helplessness continues!

Victimhood can also take another face- Aggression- a division of Egoism of victimhood.

- We might be so preoccupied with what we may be suffering currently, that we are oblivious to the pain of others.

- Sometimes, it will lead us to behave with entitlement- hence behaving more aggressively and selfishly.

What can we do about it?

This needs some serious introspection. Go for the root cause. Brain dumping and recognizing the delta between the aspiration and the current position, then jotting down all the reasons you could brainstorm. Then use the question here- How can I change this? Is this under my control? How can I respond? Then ACT! Until this becomes involuntary, this should be consciously incorporated into actions.

3. Walk out of Fear

Fear, Self-doubt, and insecurity, are plaguing women’s minds, fogging us from seizing that opportunity.

Imposter syndrome is that big word that is camouflaged within our thoughts and has a real influence on every action that we do. Just that feeling of being an imposter, feeling of undeserving, feeling of being fake that seems too true to dismiss.

We often are afraid of being wrong, of rejection, of getting embarrassed, so we put our hands down. We make sure no one hears us, we muffle our voices, and we do not need anyone else to mute us when this is lurking within us!

We should first recognize these things as and when they occur. Then think of the worst thing that could happen if you raise that concern, that question, and share that opinion.

Courage!! Is the Key. Courage to act, courage to ask for what we want, takes us a long way. Just that one second of bracing ourselves before giving up, to ask for what we want, might save us from that lifelong guilt.

Conclusion:

Before getting too caught up on the ratios and proportions of

 Men-Women partaking, we as a woman should be Knowledgeable to live a better life: Not about the industry, not about the coding, but about ourselves. What do I want, what are the choices I choose to make in my life, and what am I willing to give up to attain what I aim for? Not every working woman wants to be a CFO or COO. Take good physical and mental care of ourselves, love ourselves, and be successful the way we want to be!

*Image credits to the rightful owner

Knowledge is powerful!

Knowledge with confidence is dangerous!

Knowledge accompanied by confidence, and courage, is lethal!

Let’s prepare and be that phenomenal woman.

Cheers! 

Sru 🔥